Nine Years

Somewhere between September 15 and September 30, 2007 I officially accomplished losing 100lbs. I never wrote down the date, or I did and lost it in a move, but you don’t totally forget something like that. I thought it was the biggest weight-related accomplishment I’d ever have. I was wrong.

My biggest accomplishment is keeping it off. Though moves; my Mom living with me while she battled, and eventually succumbed to, brain cancer; job changes; depression; that time I was diagnosed with a terminal lung disease (I’ve gotten a 99% reprieve on that since); inventing a cake composed of nine desserts in one; having a pie blog; battling binge eating; and all the things that can happen over a decade of life, I’ve maintained.

Sure, there have been minor ups and down, because, hey, I’m a human being. I’ve had times when I’m very fit, other times, not so much. But it’s all been the sort of normal weight fluctuations we all can have. Life is challenging and unpredictable, we have to be flexible with it and ourselves.

I no longer worry about gaining it back. That doesn’t mean I’ve stopped being vigilant or doing the work, that never stops. But I’m confident in my habits, my creative problem solving, and my sheer stubborn determination to keep me on the underside of 200lbs.

I listened to a podcast where they interviewed track athletes about what they thought about as they were lining up for a race. I was struck that almost all of them felt they’d already won the race and now running it was just a formality. Time just had to catch up to reality. I think I knew, that last time I really lost weight, that I had already succeeded and waiting out the results on the scale was just a formality, an inevitability.

Maybe whenever we tackle life’s big challenges we have to take this approach, believe in ourselves enough that we can catapult ourselves to our inevitable victory. Not in a “I don’t have to worry about nuthin’, this is easy” denial of reality, but in a calm, steady belief that we are strong, that we are capable, that we are, in our true selves, the biggest winners.

Nine years. See you at ten 🙂

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